socoolbrewster | { 01 } how cheerfully he seems to grin how neatly spreads his claws

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{ 01 } how cheerfully he seems to grin how neatly spreads his claws

Heyyy, what's shakin', bacon?

...See, it's funny because you're food. Just a bunch of walking milkshakes.

[He snickers, a slightly unhinged little laugh, and it's clear that aside from the deathly pale skin and too-dark glint of his eyes there is something seriously Not Right about him. You may have seen him in the hallways earlier, he was skulking around for a few hours before deciding to post something.]

But anyway. I'm getting a very...Jason X vibe here. Maybe Alien: Resurrection. It's interesting. Kinda cool. Dark. I like it.

[Evil leans back in the chair, as relaxed as a tiger stalking its prey from afar, and smirks. Behind him you can see a room that looks almost stereotypically "nerdy teenage boy"; movie posters from just about every horror movie known to man paper the walls, interspersed with ones for various video games and the occasional map or hand-drawn attempt. The only thing that doesn't quite seem to fit is the large wooden crate stuck in the middle of the room.]

Chuckles, you out there? Because if this is some kind of fucked up newbie hunter joke I am so gonna kill you. And it's gonna be messy as fuck.

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[Buffy takes a few seconds to dissolve some of her rage at the Admiral before replying. The rest she uses carefully in her voice, a deadly serious sharpness in her hazel eyes.]

So you're a vampire, right?

Let me lay down some basics for you. You're dead. Again. This is the barge. You're a prisoner. Those walking milkshakes? Aren't on the menu. And if you try to get your blood-fix out of anyone here, you're gonna have to go through me.

Questions?

Edited 2012-01-15 21:16 (UTC)

[...Dude. It's...Buffy. Ed's actually kind of impressed; he'd be suitably fanboy-levels of excited, except for the part where he's kind of past the human thing. So instead he just smirks like the cocky twerp he is.]

Well well well, what do we have here. Buffy. You know, I had a phase -- not that long ago, either -- where I'd watch your show every fucking day. It's...really not as accurate as you'd think.

[Have a brief moment of wtf. Just... What. No. This is Not Good. An ex-fanboy and a vampire? How is that even fair?]

[Then she realizes this might actually end up being almost a good thing. If he knows what she's capable of. Buffy's never watched the show, although she's seen the DVD boxset.]

Okay, fangboy, if you know the show, you know I'm not kidding. Care to enlighten me on those un-accurate parts?

[Nonchalant badassary comes standard with the Buffy package:] Not that I really need the know-how. I'm all about the exploratory hack-and-slash to find out what works.

Edited 2012-01-16 12:03 (UTC)

[All the irritating smirking.] Yeah, I also know you've got a thing for 'em, so sorry if I'm not exactly shaking in my boots, miss "almost got the town slaughtered 'cause I couldn't keep it in my pants".

Well we don't do that whole moaning angsty bullshit, for one. I mean, come on. It's pathetic. And for another, crosses? Reeeally not as big a deal as you make 'em out to be.

That- [She hates you so much right now. Widened eyes and obvious signs of being embarrassed. Quickly she tries to channel all that into anger. It works and she's got quite a lot of fire in her eyes.] Wow, and just when I thought you couldn't get any more irritating.

You wanna keep pushing my buttons, Evil-Dead-lite? Or can we go ahead and skip the banter portion and get right to the punch?

...Ed, actually. But close. I'll go any time, slayerette, I'm fucking starving anyway.

[He gives her a toothy grin, eyes completely black and fangs out on display -- no point showing his cards all at once, he'll save the rest for later. He should know better, really; if she's even half as effective as she is on the show he's pretty much toast for all his bark, but he's still new. His death was a fluke, it had to be.]

[Slowww eyebrow raise. Well, alright then. Buffy walks out into the 4th floor hallway, intentionally showing her location.] Then come on down, Ed. Plenty of Slayer to go around.

[She cuts the feed.]

Edited 2012-01-19 19:41 (UTC)

[...He doesn't know any better; Jerry's approach was more 'go-go gadget cannon-fodder' than anything else, they never got around to the 'stay away from Slayers unless you KNOW you can beat them' lesson.

It doesn't take long for him to follow suit, and he's soon trotting off to meet her, hopped up on adrenaline and eagerness to prove his own hype. He stalks down the hallway, tilting his head curiously as he evaluates her, every fiber of him completely and totally unimpressed. He smirks darkly.]

What is this, a game show?

[She's ready for him, turning slowly and casually to size him up too.. And what she sees is even more hilarious than she anticipated. So she has trouble masking the spiteful confident smirk on her lips.]

Wow, someone got turned before they were done going through puberty.

[She makes it clear that she's armed with a long and sharp pointy stake, Mr. Pointy, by absentmindedly twirling it in her right hand. Buffy takes a couple of slow, smooth steps forward, completely comfortable and sure.]

Oh, ha-ha, clever, like you're the first one who's ever said that. Fuck off, I'm eighteen. And you look like a soccer mom, so.

[A mocking smile, and he stretches, head side to side then a roll of shoulders, and when she moves forward he does too, more of a stalk than a regular pace, before swiping with claws; he saw the stake, and he's a bit wary of it, but it's just a piece of wood. He's pretty sure he can get rid of it before it's a problem.]

[GOSH ED STOP INTERRUPTING HER COOL WITH COMMENTS LIKE THAT. She pauses, and absentmindedly reaches to touch her hair with a pout, thinking: It's not mom hair..

Then she retaliates.] A soccer mom? How is that even-? [He's swiping at her with his claws and while distracted, barely dodges him. Buffy comes back with a well-aimed punch, fueled with extra umph from his unsettling comments.] You are so going to pay for that.

[And she's coming at him again, stake firmly in hand, intending to shove him violently into a wall.]

Sorry, did I offend you? Totally my bad, I didn't realize it would seriously be that easy.

[A block and a kick, an unhinged laugh bursting from him at her incredulity, and he's really more amused than concerned at this point.]

Well you're definitely a MILF, if that helps.

[Shock.] I'm like four years older than you, you mook! [Buffy's dodging his kick as she speaks, then turns, spins to deliver a powerful sidekick, finishing off the move with a jump and a fist coming down towards his head.]

Edited 2012-01-21 19:51 (UTC)

[The kick connects, and he goes stumbling right into the wall, connecting with it with an audible "thunk". He snarls and bares a mouthful of shark teeth, features shifting further because WTF. By the time the jump and the fist come around he's on the defensive again, ducking out of the way and swiping at her unprotected belly as he moves.]

And with a vocabulary like that I'd mistake you for my grandma. Who the fuck says "mook"?

[Okay, so, that's... New.

It's a very different type of vamp-face, but not one that unsettles her.] Here I thought you were a fan of my show, Ed. I say mook. [The swipe gets her shirt and leaves a light scratch on her belly. This only succeeds in making her more brutal. With a glare sharp in her hazelgreen eyes, she stops holding back and goes into full swing, each movement precise, strong, very fast, and purposeful.] You ruined my shirt.

[Buffy's unleashing a flurry of hits with her fists, mixing it up every third or fourth punch with a knee to his gut or a kick to his knees. Not holding back, wanting to cause some real damage. At the end of this burst of violent energy, she's reaching to grab him with one strong, sure arm, and push him against the wall.]

Edited 2012-01-21 21:09 (UTC)

[He manages to hold his own at the beginning, giving as good as he gets and fighting tooth and nail, but he can't move fast enough, can't sustain it, can't hit as hard as before or maneuver around her as easily, and before long he's hissing and snarling as the blows land rather than smirking as he returns with his own, retreating as they do until he's finally got his back to the wall. He spits and snarls, straining against the force pinning him there, clearly pissed at the situation, and he reaches out to grab her throat; two can play this game.]

What the fuck? You're cheating.

[...Somehow. HE'S BETTER THAN THIS.]

[His hand nearly catches her throat, but she responds promptly to that with a forceful headbutt, and a quick backhand, swiping his arm away in the process. Buffy shakes him, slamming him hard against the wall.]

You're new at this, aren't you?

[Buffy is void of her usual smirk, taunt, and light in her eyes. She's looking at him with what only could be described as the look of the Slayer. Feral, ancient, fierce. Powerful.]

You ready to listen, Ed? Or am I going to have to keep making vampire paste?

[There's an audible crack as his head hits the wall, and an accompanying growl of pain, but he shakes it off quickly. Tension's strung so tight he practically hums as he strains forward again, teeth bared, glaring at her in barely restrained fury; he's better than this, he knows he is, but he can't follow through, she's everywhere all at once and he can't keep up. Ordinarily her own glare might check him; it certainly would have Before. But new circumstances, new setting, and he doesn't hurt much more than he did before.

Certainly not as much as an ax to the neck did.

He smirks back, but where before it was all amusement and leftover hero worship of a sort, now it's thoroughly predator. A predator with its back to the wall and nowhere to go.

He can wait for an opening.]

Is that what you're doing? 'Cause I think you need to check your definition; I think I got worse on a regular basis when I was still human. [He actually snickers at that. It might not actually be all that funny, but Ed seems to find it amusing enough.]

[Energizer bunny of vampires, Buffy; you're going to have to make him seriously hurt if you want him to stop, otherwise he'll just keep coming -- his breed's a stubborn bunch of fuckers.]

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{ 01 } how cheerfully he seems to grin how neatly spreads his claws

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[Video] LOL. <3 Oh Ed, you've pretty much discovered Buffy's weakness. Canon-knowledge.

[Video] d'awwww. I would promise he won't use it for nefarious purposes, but...

[Video] Oh he can. He has permission to. But he invokes the Wrath Of Buffy. XD

[Spam?] hahaha onoes!

[Spam!] Mwa ha ha. <3

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[Spam!] (Please let me know if this isn't okay. <3)

[Spam!] bahhh it's all good! <3